God has been working on me recently. He has been convicting me of a sin area in my life that I have always struggled with, the sin of having a quick temper. As you might guess, the combination of a quick temper and two 3 year olds does not go well together. I would often lose my temper and end up yelling at Lily and Wyatt as a method of "discipline". Yelling at them did nothing but make them cry and often I would end up crying as well. The look on their precious faces would pierce my heart and make me regret my anger.
I love Lily and Wyatt. If I am quickly losing my temper with my children, am I truly loving them the way that God has called me to love them? 1 Corinthians 13: 4-8a describes love this way:
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy. It does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.
In my sin I was not loving my children as God loves me; I was not reflecting the love of my heavenly Father to my children. I realized a few weeks ago that I needed to HATE my sin so that I could allow God to work in me to overcome my sin. It has since been my prayer DAILY, that God would fill me with His Spirit, allowing me to be the mom that He has created me to be; that God would allow Lily and Wyatt to feel loved by me; that I would discipline them out of love and patience and not out of anger and frustration.
I can feel God working in my heart and in our home. I am by no means a perfect mom. I still have moments when my quick temper takes over. But I must give God the glory for changing my heart; for giving me the patience and the ability to take a deep breath before dealing with a temper tantrum; for helping me become a better mom. I am confident that God, who began a good work in me, will carry it on to completion.
4 comments:
Too funny - I too have been realizing the need to change how I approach my children with love and discipline. I have found that I absolutely LOVE Dr. Kevin Leman. Shane is currently listening to one of his books on tape for the second time (How to make kids mind without losing yours) and I am reading some other one (can't think of the name). I know he has a book about being a single parent and raising godly kids. He is a great author if you haven't read any of his books.
oooh, Ben and I are taking a class on Grace Based Parenting right now. It's been convicting and challenging...and encouraging - I'm right there with you!
LOVE IT!!! and I love you!!!
reading your post reminded me of Paul (?) saying something about temptation that is "common to man". Or maybe "common to mothers of young children". I read your post and could substitute my kids' names for Lily and Wyatt... I'm right there with you, too!
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