Loneliness. It is the most overwhelming feeling. It is the feeling that I filled with most of the time. It does not matter if I am by myself or with a group of friends. There are times I feel swallowed up by it. I have wonderful parents and great friends who "take care" of me. I have a God who loves me more than I can imagine.
But...
I miss Ryan. I miss him being here. I miss being able to call him and talk to him on the phone. I miss watching the kids do new things for the first time with him. I miss his laughter at the kids antics. I miss watching him make other people laugh (even if I didn't find it funny). I miss bouncing ideas off of him. I miss discussing politics with him. I miss helping him get out the door in the morning. I miss him taking up 2/3rds of the bed at night. I miss his hugs. I miss him telling me that he loves me. I miss him just being here and it leaves me with tremendous ache inside.
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7 comments:
Kristin
praying for you daily. May the peace of God fill you.
Love, Laura
oh sweetie...i know words cannot ease your pain, but please know that you are never far from my thoughts and you are always in my prayers. please send me an email if you ever need anything, even if you just want to vent or need a sounding board. sending lots of hugs your way...
Oh Kristin how I know your pain...I wish I could make it better. You have bright days ahead, girl! Grieve those things you miss about Ryan each one you mentioned, let the pain out don't hold it in. It will aid in the healing process. Sorry I won't be there tonight.I'm praying for you friend!
Debi
Hi Kristin,
Wishing I was there to give you a giant hug! Loneliness STINKS! I am "lonely" for Liberty every single day, so in a sense I know how you feel. We pray for you and the kiddos constantly...feel free to email me anytime, no matter what mood you are in! I will be here to listen! God bless you sweetie..
Kelly
Kristin,
I don't know if we ever formally met. I was taking the finance class with Ryan at CP. I really appreciated getting to know him a bit. Reading through your loss and pain, my heart goes out to you. You are in my prayers tonight.
Brian Wilson
lots of love and hugs to you.
wrapping my thoughts and prayers around you tonight. praying that the sting of loneliness can soften just a little each day.
jolynn
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